Hurting Children

Walking along a path at a party, suddenly a saber tooth tiger attacks me from behind.

I knew he was there. I sling him onto my back. He wants to steal my crown.

I hold both his hands so he can't grab it, swinging him back and forth.

"I don't like how that feels."

I shift my grip.

"Thank you for telling me."

These days, the people I hurt are children. We all know it's innocent. If I play as hard as they want me to play, they get hurt, I get hurt, people who don't want to get dirty or wet end up dirty or wet.

When kids are around, Anything can happen.

Kids are disruptors because they are pure conduits of Anything.

We have designed society to select some of the Anything and call it appropriate, and to revile some of the Anything and call it inappropriate.

Kids are easy for those of us agile with Anything, because unlike adults, they're down to be and produce and experience Anything. One thing's sure about growing up—it teaches you right from wrong. It opens the doorway to hell. Adults are frequently at war with at least half of the Anything, the Wrong half, and they'll get mired in it in ways children won't. Children feel what's here any now.

This is why I don't emotionally process with adults—feelings do not require that.

Hurt and harm do not require processing, they require presence.

If I can repair hurt and harm with a child who is not capable of speaking, how could I think speaking is required?

Connection is a state of being. Intimacy is being in love with all that is. Being here for it, being in it, being with it.

No feeling is more vulnerable than any other feeling (certain ones feel vulnerable TO ME), no feeling requires more care, they each require different care (it might feel like more TO ME).

I hold true equanimity toward my feelings, not making any more effort to accept or process grief than joy.

All emotions require is expression and presence.

The presence of the expresser is enough.

The presence of others can make it more bearable. The proximity of others can make it far worse.

We are all here to feel it all. It's ok to resist it—that's one of the feelings we're here to feel.