Rippleless

As I've come to my knees humbly for grief, I know what it is that's at stake.

I know what it is to let go of what's at stake

Righteousness

Sanctimony

Control

The wrenching away of all I've held meaningful, important, urgent, MINE.

How could I hold them, though, once I'd seen their falsehood?

Coming to grief is coming to now. All of the overwhelm of infinity coming at you in physical form, wild and true, blowing apart every delusion you had.

It hurts so bad

and I can't help but be grateful.

I always want the truth.

The practice, however, extends beyond this.

We must learn how to operate in humility over righteousness, intimacy over sanctimony, surrender over control. We must learn what compassionate responses sound like and how to place our attention to receive better experiences of our loved ones, have and tend a new narrative (and maybe also a new way of building narratives about loved ones).

This practice is nuanced, some tuning of the circumstances I'll show up for, some tuning of how I show up, an emergent process, which is why I work with clients long term.

Imagine you've held your fist tightly for an hour, and you notice this and decide to release it.

You open your hand, and immediately close it. Twirl your wrist, open the fist again.

Open and closed and open and closed, until it is comfortable in both states, and then you notice both states are actually ALL states and this hand is not only free, but a skilled tool.

This is what our work does within you, helping you see what you're letting go, and how grasping for it back, for that well-known contraction, is part of the process.

Seeing your own cycle rightly, you can experience the waves in peace.

Experiencing the waves in peace, you learn how to operate in still water without creating a ripple.