When the Boundary Works

want more? the boundary is working

When the boundary works, feelings of intimacy return.

The correct distance for any relationship is determined by the connection. When the connection feels good, you are at the correct distance.

This is one of the trickiest parts of having and holding boundaries.

When the boundary works, feelings of intense love and intimacy presence, and we often take that as a sign to move closer.

But the feelings of love and intimacy are a result of achieving the exact right distance. Moving closer can collapse this balance once again. We are seeing love and intimacy because we are at the correct distance. We are not seeing a change in personality or the emergence of greater compatibility, we are finally appreciating the person for who they are, we are finally operating in our compatible zone.

This is why SO MANY people cycle out of and back into challenging relationships when their love-connection is strong.

We are all capable of intensely loving ANYONE on this planet.

Living with them is another story.

Connection is about love

Relationship is about time, energy, attention, habit, practice.

Love is enough for connection.

Relationship requires compatibility.